Discussion I think I have a chance this week

[In2TheVoid]

I have been sitting on N for 2 months now but have been trying to hold out for the sake of my family.

I have been wanting to make CTB look like an accident and in the next week I believe I will have a chance (without too many details: N + ocean).

Will I have the courage to take the chance? And is it courage, or would it be courage to try to keep living when every day hurts so much?

 

[WornOutLife]

As regards my life, it's the second option.
I'm really trying to live, but damn, it certainly hurts!!

Whatever happens, wish you lots of love and peace!

Hugs,

Matt

 

[FuneralCry]

If this is the option you want then I wish you the best. It can be hard when you want to leave but the thought of others is holding you back. I think both ways - to live through pain and to die both require courage.

 

[hahabye]

I was just about to write the same thing as @FuneralCry did. Courage is choosing to live, courage is choosing to die. Whichever choice you make - I wish you lots of courage. And peace.

 

[In2TheVoid]

Thanks for the replies... might try my DMT and see if it sways me in one direction or the other before I get the chance to escape.

I don't want to hurt anyone but I just can't see things improving for me... and I think an "accident" would be easier to handle for those around me if I can make it believable

 

[In2TheVoid]

Still here for now I guess

 

[hahabye]

Still here for now I guess

There is no rush, hope you're doing okay

 

[In2TheVoid]

There is no rush, hope you're doing okay

Thank you :-) I really want to make it look accidental and I didn't think it would be convincing... I think I will have another chance soon and will use the time to think about it. I was actually having some pretty good days but I think it's because I feel like I am close to leaving + trying to leave family with happy interactions

 

[Bullit]

Isn't that the ultimate question? "To be or not to be." (Hope you don't mind me dropping a little culture on yaz.)

I think about it constantly. My life will never be any good,but still I haven't done it yet!