How to deal with joylessness?

[Odwin]

Since about 9 years it began that I don't really enjoy things anymore. I always told myself "it's getting better someday". I tried different things out to escape from myself and for a little time, but in end I dropped everything.

Now all things I do is just to pass time.

I did even extrem things to escape it. I even joined the military for a few years. Like the ultimate distraction and forced to socialize with people. Like always in the beginning it always helped me kinda, but nothing was permanent.

Wish the is something that could wire me differently. I hate to pretend stuff and when I am not pretending people get mad at me.

 

[GenesAndEnvironment]

I tried different things out to escape from myself and for a little time, but in end I dropped everything.

Now all things I do is just to pass time.

100%, I'm with you in the same spot.

I guess we'd need a reason to deal with anhedonia/joylessness/depression/etc in the first place. For me the future looks so awful that I'm not sure getting rid of suicidality is even a smart move. If we have a good reason to not only survive for a little while longer but to enjoy life somehow I guess it's possible to eventually get there somehow.

 

[Bat 17]

I haven't suffered anything like as long, but since I got depressed over a year ago the anhedonia has been one of the toughest symptoms to shift.

I'm on a raft of medications and they haven't reached the anhedonia either.

A lot of the time I just sit on the sofa staring into space. I can't enjoy music anymore, nor the tv, thank god I can read.

I really should try and get more exercise. Do you have hobbies that involve getting outdoors and / or exercise ?

 

[Trisolaris]

Have you tried medication?

 

[Odwin]

I really should try and get more exercise. Do you have hobbies that involve getting outdoors and / or exercise ?

Well I did go to the gym 3x the week, but since the accident I got in the military. Not really anymore. I usually don't go outside.

Have you tried medication?

I don't get medication.

 

[Carrotcake]

Do you experience other types of emotions/moods? Or is it just general numbness?

 

[WornOutLife]

That's really hard because a life without joy and goals is not a life at all.

The only way to solve this is to keep looking until you find something you like. There's gotta exist THAT thing.
In my case, it was learning languages. I just love them.

Once you find it, your days become more doable and you add short tasks little by little such as taking a shower, cooking, cleaning up everyday, etc.

Best of luck!!

 

[Bat 17]

Well I did go to the gym 3x the week, but since the accident I got in the military. Not really anymore. I usually don't go outside.

I don't get medication.

I think you might want to look into both of these. Medication has helped me, despite the side effects

I think we are both missing out not getting more exercise. Good evidence of effect for depressive symptoms and also improving self-esteem. I wish I could motivate myself enough to do it. Is there stuff you can do notwithstanding your injury, such as swimming (covid permitting ) ?

 

[Odwin]

Do you experience other types of emotions/moods? Or is it just general numbness?

When people expect something from me I get angry. Unreasonable angry.
Often when I tried something new I got like really motivated to do stuff, but after a week I just drop the ball.

Do you mean stuff like that?

I think you might want to look into both of these. Medication has helped me, despite the side effects

Need to be honest here never really went to professional help. Since I am out of the military I don't know what kind of insurance I have.
I am still in in-between state. Yeah, I should go into it and research it, but I cant

The only way to solve this is to keep looking until you find something like. There's gotta exist THAT thing.
In my case, it was learning languages. I just love them.

That's true. It's not like I am not searching. I did always, but I think I am the end of the line.

 

[Bat 17]

When people expect something from me I get angry. Unreasonable angry.

A very common symptom of depression that isn't much publicised

I used to get frustrated and angry all the time and that's one thing the antidepressants have really helped with - now I'm pretty chilled (albeit depressed in other respects lol)

 

[saltshaker]

Often when I tried something new I got like really motivated to do stuff, but after a week I just drop the ball.

Hmm to me this sounds like bipolarism, or at least depression.

If you haven't tried an SSRI you should give it a go i think. For a first treatment your regular GP can probably write you a script for zoloft or something similar.

Don't be hesitant, it might really help you, and worst case they don't work and you simply stop taking them.

 

[LunarPyotr]

Same for me, I used to go more often outside, drive around with bicycle and even was in a club but nowadays I'm spending 97% of my time inside, I'm not in any clubs and sometimes there is a situation where I just stay in bed all the time, browse social media and maybe play some games on my switch..

Even though I'm smoking CBD and don't feel like I want to jump in front of the train and letting it take me somewhere, I still don't feel like I want to do anything because it doesn't make a diffrence for me if I do it or not.

 

[Odwin]

If you haven't tried an SSRI you should give it a go i think. For a first treatment your regular GP can probably write you a script for zoloft or something similar.

What's a SSRI?

 

[saltshaker]

What's a SSRI?

A modern type of anti-depressant. They are pretty safe but take 4-6 weeks to take effect.

 

[Odwin]

A modern type of anti-depressant. They are pretty safe but take 4-6 weeks to take effect.

Ah I see. Thanks