In2TheVoid
Pathological
- Feb 18, 2021
- 75
I've been walking around and feeling peaceful and I think it's because I've finally decided I'm going to do it. I had a chance a while ago and didn't do it, but I rehearsed all the steps.
I'm trying to have a nice time with my family because they are good people. Going to try to disappear into nature with my N so that when / if I'm found it's not clear how I died.
I hope there's nothing after death or that I get a chance to relive this life. I could have lived an amazing and useful life if I hadn't destroyed myself while manic. I have let so many good people down and sabotaged what could have been so enjoyable. Pathological gambling is an evil disease of the mind.
I want to say thank you to everyone here who has interacted with me and shared their stories. I have been luckier than most and in some sense it makes me feel worse, because I wanted to make the world a kinder place. I wish you all the best and am grateful for this site... I'll definitely update this thread as the date approaches.
I'm trying to have a nice time with my family because they are good people. Going to try to disappear into nature with my N so that when / if I'm found it's not clear how I died.
I hope there's nothing after death or that I get a chance to relive this life. I could have lived an amazing and useful life if I hadn't destroyed myself while manic. I have let so many good people down and sabotaged what could have been so enjoyable. Pathological gambling is an evil disease of the mind.
I want to say thank you to everyone here who has interacted with me and shared their stories. I have been luckier than most and in some sense it makes me feel worse, because I wanted to make the world a kinder place. I wish you all the best and am grateful for this site... I'll definitely update this thread as the date approaches.
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