these_days9
Specialist
- Dec 25, 2019
- 329
I don't even know if I believe in God to be honest but if some greater being exists, they're fucking evil. No question.
And if it's just random? I just can't wrap my head around it. I almost hope there's some god-like fuck out there torturing all of us.
I don't even know what I'm looking for here, I probably could/should just put this in a journal. But I just read all the shit you all deal with, and I can't imagine anything close to a human would create or condone this. I always think about how truly awful and unbearable life feels for me, someone who has it pretty damn good, and I just rage at how immeasurably worse it must feel for others who experience true hardship and trauma.
I wouldn't wish existence on anyone, even my very worst enemy. And the presumed only way out? Totally vilified by society and painful. So not only are we socialized to think there's something wrong with us when we want to die, but it's impossible to do it without fear and experience of emotional and physical agony, money/means, and truly lots of luck.
just fucked. how are there so many of us that feel something like this and yet living is still the assumed the standard? do we really believe there are people who enjoy/choose life and still would if it was more socialized that you don't have to? if so are they just dumb dumbs? or is something really wrong with me/the alternative? And there it is again.
And if it's just random? I just can't wrap my head around it. I almost hope there's some god-like fuck out there torturing all of us.
I don't even know what I'm looking for here, I probably could/should just put this in a journal. But I just read all the shit you all deal with, and I can't imagine anything close to a human would create or condone this. I always think about how truly awful and unbearable life feels for me, someone who has it pretty damn good, and I just rage at how immeasurably worse it must feel for others who experience true hardship and trauma.
I wouldn't wish existence on anyone, even my very worst enemy. And the presumed only way out? Totally vilified by society and painful. So not only are we socialized to think there's something wrong with us when we want to die, but it's impossible to do it without fear and experience of emotional and physical agony, money/means, and truly lots of luck.
just fucked. how are there so many of us that feel something like this and yet living is still the assumed the standard? do we really believe there are people who enjoy/choose life and still would if it was more socialized that you don't have to? if so are they just dumb dumbs? or is something really wrong with me/the alternative? And there it is again.