Discussion Girl has a crush on me but I just feel Guilty

[abruptum]

ok so just a quick check in, i've been doing really horribly with my mental state and i contemplated going and sectioning myself before i realized it cost me money to do so. s/h is still bad, i just overall am in constant distress to the point my friends offered to help me financially go to new horizons.
AnywYs the real part of the post for those who are just here for that discussion. This girl at work where i've been for the past month and a half about slowly dropped hints she might be interested in me when i first started. She's very pretty and sweet but i am not in a place where any sort of relationship is feasible in my mind. So eventually she added me on social media and started to talk to me a bit, turns out she's a very straightforward person and told me that she thinks i'm perfect and is sad that i don't see myself the same way and she wants to treat me how i deserve to be treated. She compliments me every day and makes sure to check in on me and does all that stuff that really nobody else has done for me. But it's just unfathomable for me to think someone can actually see me and want to put in this much effort when i've explained to them that I won't and can't be in a relationship, i've even explained to her surface lvl detail about why my mental state isn't healthy for that.
Idk i guess i should be glad someone feels that way for me but it's just guilt knowing that it feels completely undeserved .

 

[Celerity]

Well, I'm the kind of person who doesn't ask if I deserve XYZ good thing when life decides to be generous; I just take it. However, IMO, you would find a way to be with her if you were really interested. It sounds to me like you enjoy the emotional benefits the relationship could offer more than her. I think you should continue to be straight with her and rebuff her.

 

[abruptum]

Well, I'm the kind of person who doesn't ask if I deserve XYZ good thing when life decides to be generous; I just take it. However, IMO, you would find a way to be with her if you were really interested. It sounds to me like you enjoy the emotional benefits the relationship could offer more than her. I think you should continue to be straight with her and rebuff her.

don't worry i've been straight up about the whole thing, that's the part where i feel guilty because she's said her feelings for me won't waver and she's going to continue to compliment and do things for me to see me smile
but also i'm not sure i'll every want a relationship in my life after my last

 

[GenesAndEnvironment]

ok so just a quick check in, i've been doing really horribly with my mental state and i contemplated going and sectioning myself before i realized it cost me money to do so. s/h is still bad, i just overall am in constant distress to the point my friends offered to help me financially go to new horizons.
AnywYs the real part of the post for those who are just here for that discussion. This girl at work where i've been for the past month and a half about slowly dropped hints she might be interested in me when i first started. She's very pretty and sweet but i am not in a place where any sort of relationship is feasible in my mind. So eventually she added me on social media and started to talk to me a bit, turns out she's a very straightforward person and told me that she thinks i'm perfect and is sad that i don't see myself the same way and she wants to treat me how i deserve to be treated. She compliments me every day and makes sure to check in on me and does all that stuff that really nobody else has done for me. But it's just unfathomable for me to think someone can actually see me and want to put in this much effort when i've explained to them that I won't and can't be in a relationship, i've even explained to her surface lvl detail about why my mental state isn't healthy for that.
Idk i guess i should be glad someone feels that way for me but it's just guilt knowing that it feels completely undeserved .

Horrible situation, I'm so sorry. Sending hugs.

 

[PapaSuicide]

When an angel shows up, enjoy my friend! They are rare! Allow yourself to live this love before you go!

 

[Celerity]

When an angel shows up, enjoy my friend! They are rare! Allow yourself to live this love before you go!

That's my thinking. My feeling is OP isn't interested, but only he or she can decide that for themselves.

 

[FuneralCry]

I think you have probably done the right thing, being honest to her as relationships require commitment and you have to be mentally in the right place. I think it's normal to feel guilty, and it must have been hard to let her down as you don't want to upset her. I wish you the best.

 

[abruptum]

When an angel shows up, enjoy my friend! They are rare! Allow yourself to live this love before you go!

That's my thinking. My feeling is OP isn't interested, but only he or she can decide that for themselves.

it's just i like her as a friend and we have a good dynamic but i can't do a relationship or anything i just find it so unfair that someone can think so highly of me when i've done nothing to deserve all the praise

 

[Bullit]

If you don't want her,l'll take her! She sounds like a quality girl!

 

[Marktheghost]

That's so sweet of her! Please will you send her my way? I need someone to treat me that way!

In the meantime, just continue to be honest with her, and enjoy the attention she gives you, and the friendship.

 

[WornOutLife]

I'm so glad you were honest with her!!!
I did something similar with a girl some months ago but when I told her I was suicidal and very depressed she blocked me lol.

Love could really help us but it's better we're 100% honest, just in case!

Whatever happens, with or without love, I wish you the best!!

Hugs,

Matt

 

[NothingElseMatters]

that's a distant dream for me, a girl falling in love with me

 

[abruptum]

I'm so glad you were honest with her!!!
I did something similar with a girl some months ago but when I told her I was suicidal and very depressed she blocked me lol.

Love could really help us but it's better we're 100% honest, just in case!

Whatever happens, with or without love, I wish you the best!!

Hugs,

Matt

yeah i'm very open about everything so she's also super aware of my mental state, i'm sure love could help if i was able to not be so drained by the cost of love

 

[Sprite_Geist]

She seems like a kind person, and if you are seriously interested in having a relationship then you should absoloutely go for it - in my opinion. Think about this: how many people do you know in the real world who would be willing to give you a chance, romantically or otherwise, despite knowing that you have mental health issues and low self-esteem? These people are very rare characters - especially in the current climate of narcissism and impossible-to-reach standards.

You have said in your initial post that a relationship might not be feasible for you, so this post is just an example - if you were interested in one.

 

[eternalmelancholy]

I've had an eerily similar situation happen to me. This girl who was clearly out of my league kept following me around and acted interested in me. From the start I knew something was off. I found out later that she was making fun of me behind my back to her friends.

I already know I am a loser no one has to remind me. How does the saying go; if something seems too good to be true it probably is.

 

[Celerity]

I've had an eerily similar situation happen to me. This girl who was clearly out of my league kept following me around and acted interested in me. From the start I knew something was off. I found out later that she was making fun of me behind my back to her friends.

I already know I am a loser no one has to remind me. How does the saying go; if something seems too good to be true it probably is.

Damn, that's terrible.

 

[Sprite_Geist]

I've had an eerily similar situation happen to me. This girl who was clearly out of my league kept following me around and acted interested in me. From the start I knew something was off. I found out later that she was making fun of me behind my back to her friends.

I already know I am a loser no one has to remind me. How does the saying go; if something seems too good to be true it probably is.

She is/was behaving like a bully. You are not the "loser" in this situation.