Asperger's girl

[x_LittleAmy_x]

Hi xx
Any other Aspie girls on here?
I feeling sooo bad. school and college were ok for me despite being on the spectrum but my life has not have any direction since I left college.
I'm now 20 years old, living with parents and don't fit in anywhere.
I honestly feel like the world is not made for people like me
Can anyone relate?

 

[GenesAndEnvironment]

I'm probably not on the spectrum but I relate to not fitting in and permanently being in the wrong place at the wrong time.

 

[reposing]

Hey! I'm not on the spectrum but I do have ADHD. I know they're not the same and very different, but neurodivergent all the same.
I definitely agree with you- the world is biased and living in it is incredibly difficult.
You might not feel like you fit in, but you are not alone.

 

[Misfit72]

There was Callie Lewis three years ago. I'm not a girl, and have never been diagnosed, being of a generation when few boys were, let alone girls. There seems to be a myth that it's confined to boys, perhaps because Hans Asperger himself never worked with girls. I prefer to use the term 'with autism', partly as people either mispronounce his surname as 'asperjer' or make childish 'ass-burger' jokes, and partly because there's evidence that Asperger was a Nazi collaborator, though living in 1940s Vienna does lend itself to that.

 

[x_LittleAmy_x]

There was Callie Lewis three years ago. I'm not a girl, and have never been diagnosed, being of a generation when few boys were, let alone girls. There seems to be a myth that it's confined to boys, perhaps because Hans Asperger himself never worked with girls. I prefer to use the term 'with autism', partly as people either mispronounce his surname as 'asperjer' or make childish 'ass-burger' jokes, and partly because there's evidence that Asperger was a Nazi collaborator, though living in 1940s Vienna does lend itself to that.

According to research undertaken over many years by Professor Simon Baron-Cohen, Asperger's is fundamentally a 'mind blindness' issue.
Essentially this means that people with Asperger's find it more difficult to 'put themselves in other people's shoes'. It is more prevalent in boys than girls due to boy's minds being built for systemising whereas girl's minds are more geared towards empathising.

 

[reposing]

partly because there's evidence that Asperger was a Nazi collaborator, though living in 1940s Vienna does lend itself to that.

Wow, I can say for certain this caught me off guard. I'll have to look into this lmao

 

[amarillo]

I haven't been diagnosed but I suspect I might be on the spectrum as well (it also runs in both sides of my family). I completely recognise the feeling of not fitting in. This world just wasn't made for me, everything is difficult and I don't understand how anything works. At least on here we can not fit in together :')

 

[insanedoomer]

Hi xx
Any other Aspie girls on here?
I feeling sooo bad. school and college were ok for me despite being on the spectrum but my life has not have any direction since I left college.
I'm now 20 years old, living with parents and don't fit in anywhere.
I honestly feel like the world is not made for people like me
Can anyone relate?

This forum is made for people like you

 

[noaccount]

According to research undertaken over many years by Professor Simon Baron-Cohen, Asperger's is fundamentally a 'mind blindness' issue.
Essentially this means that people with Asperger's find it more difficult to 'put themselves in other people's shoes'. It is more prevalent in boys than girls due to boy's minds being built for systemising whereas girl's minds are more geared towards empathising.

Hi! Cordelia Fine did a really good job of debunking the idea of "brain sex" in "Delusions Of Gender." Basically, just because men are more socially-rewarded for being aggressive and women are more socially-shamed for the same behavior, and this effects us profoundly because of neuroplasticity, doesn't mean that there's anything natural or inevitable about it. :)

You can find a lot of autistic adults critiquing Baron-Cohen's work, and a lot of accounts of Autistic empathy (and hyper-empathy!) at the Autism Women's Network (awnnetwork.org) and autistic self-advocacy network.

 

[untimelydemise]

i have autism

 

[HopelessCookie]

I was diagnosed with ASD late last year at 27, it only took me spiralling into depression for anyone to notice something else could be going on. I've somehow managed to hold down full time work since 18 even though it's affected my mental health so much, i'm forever getting "told off" and my current boss believes she's very supportive but if I happen to struggle with the workload, she blames me for not being able to cope rather than the workload being too much (I've done this sort of work for years, I know how much work is too much for me) anyway I could rant about it for ages. I definitely agree about feeling the world is not made for me too even more so with my diagnosis. I grew up being told by my family what I did wasn't good enough, didn't get distinction at college: not good enough, struggle to drive: not good enough, I need to grow up etc etc -.- and now none of them believe my diagnosis either so that's great... Apologies i'm in a ranty mood at the moment haha.

 

[Ennail]

Hi i have ASD. I feel you

 

[noaccount]

There's nothing to "believe" or disbelieve, it's just a subjective descriptor that's used to describe a loose constellation of experiences that can come from *many different causes* - It's not an explanation of WHY we're having the experience.
Nor do we have to look at it as a Disorder - let's call Allism the disorder if anything, or look at the issue through the social model of disability, rather than medical.

 

[Aelana]

Yeah I'm in the exact same position, and also the same age as you. :p

 

[x_LittleAmy_x]

Yeah I'm in the exact same position, and also the same age as you. :p

Hey xx
We should keep in touch.

 

[Despairing]

No but my friend had this and he ctb 5 months ago. The doctor Hans Asperger called it "Autistic Psychopathy"

 

[nolongerhuman]

Hi xx
Any other Aspie girls on here?
I feeling sooo bad. school and college were ok for me despite being on the spectrum but my life has not have any direction since I left college.
I'm now 20 years old, living with parents and don't fit in anywhere.
I honestly feel like the world is not made for people like me
Can anyone relate?

Another woman with ASD here. I'm 22 and about to finish college. I agree with feeling like the world isn't designed with us in mind. I feel like I have to work multiple times as hard to do things that non-autistic people can do easily. It's exhausting.

 

[Despairing]

I also feel like the world is not for me. I see everything as futile in the grand scheme of things. I often wonder myself if I have Aspergers.

I haven't been diagnosed but I suspect I might be on the spectrum as well (it also runs in both sides of my family). I completely recognise the feeling of not fitting in. This world just wasn't made for me, everything is difficult and I don't understand how anything works. At least on here we can not fit in together :')

 

[noaccount]

Yeah, society isn't designed for us. That doesn't make us disordered or in need of 'fixing' though. A lot of society isn't designed for gay people, in generations past it was set up to make things quite impossible for left-handed people too.
... But that's not a reflection on us.

 

[Trans Magus]

Yes.

I'm trans, though.

 

[Grave]

Yes.

I'm trans, though.

Hey, same.

I'm trans (FtM) and I have ASD

 

[Sprite_Geist]

I'm now 20 years old, living with parents and don't fit in anywhere.
I honestly feel like the world is not made for people like me
Can anyone relate?

This may help (or maybe not), but the world is not made for anyone at all. Every living organism (including humans) exist in various environments and they must adapt to survive in them. However: just because an individual is not successful at thriving wherever they live that does not mean that they are at fault. Some environments - specifically human ones - are so unnecessarily hostile and toxic that it is just not worth it to adapt, in fact it is very unhealthy as well; similarly to how some aquatic animals cannot survive outside of a certain pH range.

So please do not think that you are the one with a problem because you cannot "fit in". It is possible that you are surrounded by less-than-kind individuals.

 

[ansiedad]

I have BPD.

 

[GenesAndEnvironment]

This may help (or maybe not), but the world is not made for anyone at all. Every living organism (including humans) exist in various environments and they must adapt to survive in them. However: just because an individual is not successful at thriving wherever they live that does not mean that they are at fault. Some environments - specifically human ones - are so unnecessarily hostile and toxic that it is just not worth it to adapt, in fact it is very unhealthy as well; similarly to how some aquatic animals cannot survive outside of a certain pH range.

So please do not think that you are the one with a problem because you cannot "fit in". It is possible that you are surrounded by less-than-kind individuals.

I'm proud of myself for following you. Ace post.

 

[Marktheghost]

I can relate. I don't fit in anywhere.

 

[Ruinedlifex]

I'm severely autistic, so I know how it is. People either find me incredibly weird/awkward or they find me offensive. :(

 

[Embers]

I'm autistic, 25 and female. I relate to everything you've said. I feel I simply was not cut out for this world.

 

[Viov]

I feel like this all the time, and increasingly more so lately which is my reason to ctb. Despite having a diagnosis there isn't really any help and as you say, the world just isn't designed for us to fit in unfortunately

 

[muffin222]

Fellow Aspie girl here. I also believe very strongly that the world is not built for someone like me, and that despite my most Herculean efforts, life will always feel like it's set to "hard mode" for me. I feel lonely inside, even when around other humans.

The constant misunderstandings and the resultant anger and frustration that people hurl at me when I commit yet another social blunder takes a humongous toll on me emotionally.

I fear even attempting to forge connections with new people at this point, as I know that the clock is always ticking before the next misunderstanding and the subsequent "damage control" I'll need to implement to fix it. I question whether social interaction is even worth the hassle anymore.

Societal change is occurring to try to accommodate Neurodivergent people, but it's moving at a glacially slow pace. You're not alone in feeling this way

 

[Lostandlooking]

I'm autistic as well and a female, though a bit older. Diagnosed when I was 26.

I was diagnosed with ASD late last year at 27, it only took me spiralling into depression for anyone to notice something else could be going on. I've somehow managed to hold down full time work since 18 even though it's affected my mental health so much, i'm forever getting "told off" and my current boss believes she's very supportive but if I happen to struggle with the workload, she blames me for not being able to cope rather than the workload being too much (I've done this sort of work for years, I know how much work is too much for me) anyway I could rant about it for ages. I definitely agree about feeling the world is not made for me too even more so with my diagnosis. I grew up being told by my family what I did wasn't good enough, didn't get distinction at college: not good enough, struggle to drive: not good enough, I need to grow up etc etc -.- and now none of them believe my diagnosis either so that's great... Apologies i'm in a ranty mood at the moment haha.

I feel this. Also tried to work, lots of different places. I always burn out. And people don't take me seriously either. They simply do not believe me when I say something is too stressful/too much.

Fellow Aspie girl here. I also believe very strongly that the world is not built for someone like me, and that despite my most Herculean efforts, life will always feel like it's set to "hard mode" for me. I feel lonely inside, even when around other humans.

The constant misunderstandings and the resultant anger and frustration that people hurl at me when I commit yet another social blunder takes a humongous toll on me emotionally.

I fear even attempting to forge connections with new people at this point, as I know that the clock is always ticking before the next misunderstanding and the subsequent "damage control" I'll need to implement to fix it. I question whether social interaction is even worth the hassle anymore.

Societal change is occurring to try to accommodate Neurodivergent people, but it's moving at a glacially slow pace. You're not alone in feeling this way

I've decided to stop forging new relationships. Also because it seems pretty inevitable that I'll eventually ctb. My cats are a big reason to stay for now.