Discussion Are you planning to leave a suicide note ? #47

[MeltingBrain]

I am planning to leave one for my family for closure if I ever kms.
What about you ?
Especially the "no" answers .
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#47
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[Praestat_Mori]

Unsure - probably yes.

Hru @MeltingBrain ?

 

[MeltingBrain]

Hru @MeltingBrain ?

Not very well . I wish I had better news. Thank you for asking :)

 

[Depressed2]

For who? Why?
I don't have anyone.

 

[Forveleth]

Yes. I want those closest to me to know they drove me to this point.

 

[helterskelter]

i dont know who would read it. maybe an apology for the poor biohazard cleaners

 

[ChaosWandering]

No.

 

[Nobodi]

No. The reason why is that I just want to be forgotten, I just want to be left alone. I don't owe any them a explanation. Maybe here on the thread since no knows how I look like or who I am. Maybe one last vent to just dish it all out

 

[areyousafe??]

I used to want to leave a letter of some sort, to apologise to my family I suppose. But I've come to realise that no apology will undo their upset/pain, so there is no point in leaving a note. I have nothing else I want to say anyway.

I do want to leave my long term treating psychiatrist a note though, but I don't want him to find out that I've kms.

 

[FuneralCry]

I would write one to explain how I never wished to exist and how non-existence is always preferable for me than suffering in this futile, torturous existence, to me existence is a terrible mistake that just causes so much harm all for the sake of it. I'd explain how non-existence is all I ever saw as desirable and that I'd always prefer to cease existing than to be burdened with this existence where there is no limit as to how much agony one can feel just to be tormented by old age. To me existence itself will always be the problem, I wish this existence was never imposed, under no circumstances would I wish to be conscious in this existence, I just wish for the peace of an eternal, dreamless sleep instead where there is no more pain, no more suffering.

 

[Namelesa]

If I can CTB I want to leave note for my parents just saying how much i hate them and how I want them to suffer because I had to deal with them trapping and physically preventing me from CTB.

 

[avalokitesvara]

Yes. I want my family to know that I calmly chose death because my only viable life was impossible. I want them to know it was a "positive" choice for me in that it was my desire and decision, not something that I was scared of or felt pushed into. I want them to know that I feel happy to go. I want them to remember that death is natural and would come for me anyway. I want to do my best to absolve them of guilt.

 

[Ironborn]

No I like to keep my enemies guessing, never let them know my next move.

 

[sashaphire]

I plan to leave a note on the door warning my parents to call an ambulance before they open the door (that I will lock and probably use a chair to keep shut) and instead of leaving one huge note, print out a bunch of my private social media rant posts. If I write a note it won't be genuine and each one I've tried to write in advance I had to throw away and start over because it sucked or made me cringe, but my random rant posts on all 30000 of my private social media accounts have all still felt accurate to me. I had also thought about not leaving a note at all but I couldn't bear the thought of people incorrectly spreading some wrong and stupid reasons (even though I won't be alive to hear it) so I had to leave something.

 

[ButterflyKilled]

Yeah, definitely! I am already writing a letter for my family and message special for each language (3 in total) for friends near me and those who I met through internet that live abroad. Although it is just some papers or a digital text, some people are very special for me and I'd like to leave a note so they can know I ctb peacefully and under my wish. For my family, I extended the content because some facts I have to clear up, I particularly live with old people and they'll miss me A LOT, I hope they read my letter and feel "better", I just worry because one of them can have a stroke and die (bad medical history).

 

[TheHolySword]

Yes. I'm writing one individually for my parents and siblings. I'm writing one collectively for my friend group. I'm writing one special for my best friend. I'm also writing a blog type thing that will be a biography of sorts - filled with me talking about my memories and life, poems and other selected writings, stuff like that. The letters will be to give them some peace of mind and the blog will be to let them relive my life in a happier way

 

[ninfanatic]

i honestly think my entire internet history/presence is a suicide note.

 

[broken_doll]

i go back and forth between yes and no but i think i'll probably end up with no at the end.

i don't really care what i have to say, so why should i bother writing anything. if i can't even care, there's no way anyone else would. so. yeah! i talk to some ppl online that. idk if they'd consider me an actual friend but. there's no real point messaging anyone becauuuuse. my presence would go unnoticed anyway and why make random people feel guilted into faux caring?
okay woops it just all sounds so self pitying, reading it back. sorrrryy about that! XD

tl;dr - i have nothing worth reading to leave behind

 

[TragedyBornCrimson]

I intend to as a way to give my family as much closure as possible and to prevent them from blaming themselves. And so that if other people question them, other people know it's not their fault. I want to be perpetrator/enemy , my family is the victim of my existance.

 

[arandomname]

No, ideally nobody would find me after I CTB and everyone would just think I disappeared somewhere. Not sure how practical that will be but worth trying.

 

[SilentSadness]

There's no point, it wouldn't change anything about how someone felt about me. They are just going to think I'm a mentally ill person who made a tragic preventable mistake and never suffered regardless, so it doesn't matter what kind of note is written. Additionally, the contents of the note would be used against you which can be dangerous especially if you don't succeed. I don't think I owe anyone an explanation at this point.

 

[Prism]

No, I just don't have the energy for that. Plus my mood changes so often that I'm very indecisive about what I would even write in it. At most, I'd leave a few words regarding some last requests.

 

[Shatami44]

nope. just gonna leave everything up for debate.

 

[hereornot]

Yes. A video. Just to make a few things clear before my awful family wants to speculate on the motives on their own, putting all the blame on me and letting them off the hook.

 

[uselessflesh]

no, if no one listens to me in life then why would they outside of it

 

[iwantmycatback]

I think I will. I want to give closure to the people who care about me.

 

[Gone soon]

I'm unsure. Maybe one telling my family that everything was mostly their fault. I'll certainly write a goodbye letter to the people on this forum, which are more of a family to me than anyone else

 

[LoneTraveler]

I plan on leaving letters for people that are important. Already struggling with my partner CTB without leaving a letter and I don't want to leave the few people I care about without a letter. Feel awful for leaving in probably a year but I can hardly stand it anymore so tired of everything.

 

[Gstreater]

I want to leave one just to explain to everyone that it wasn't their fault. That it was just everything in life finally getting to me.

 

[restingplace]

I am planning to leave one for my family for closure if I ever kms.
What about you ?
Especially the "no" answers .
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You can find previous polls here: https://sanctioned-suicide.net/threads/meltingbrain-all-polls.123887/
Part of : https://sanctioned-suicide.net/thre...st-at-least-1-poll-daily.123125/#post-2051973
DailyPoll
#47
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Was going to but I can't be bothered anymore, I don't have anything to explain or say