Discussion Am I the only one who doesn't worry about leaving people miserable behind

[defunkt]

I see so many folks discussing this and I honestly personally, live with a toxic family that I still love for some reason, don't get me wrong, as fucked as that may be.
But I don't think someone who didn't stop me from dying, when most of it started with their narcissist behavior and toxicity and self serving behavior? Would truly give a fuck if I died.
She knows I'm suicidal and yet continued to do the most toxic things.
So say I do somehow make her miss me when I'm gone I still don't give a shit about leaving her traumatized or something. I'm sure she and the rest of my family will get over it plenty fast.
So yes, I think even when I was in a relationship it was the same even when I was deluded about so much, it was the same.
What do you guys think?

 

[ADBoy777]

I feel sorry only for my family. I know they will miss me and never truly get over it

 

[Coffeandamug]

Funny cause I know my family may suffer... and they are, honestly, good people...but I can't feel guilty or bad for them. I just don't feel this feeling. I know my mom will specially suffer. My sisters and my dad also will... but not that by that much. I saw that years ago when I had decided to go and told them. And I'm glad, I want them to live their lives despite of me.Some things happend, I coudn't go... but at least that offered a glimpse of what would be when I go. I just don't know why I don't feel sorry for them. Maybe cause I'll make sure they know it's not their fault ? There's something similar that I went through; I'm gay and my family is deeply religious. I always coudn't care less if I was gonna hurt them by being what I am. And now I won't care less for what they'll feel for something that I'll do with MY body and MY life. Idk... it just doesn't belong to them. It really doesn't. It's not my place to feel sorry for them feeling sorry for something that, yes, will affect them, but that is MINE to decide.

 

[astrichaoz]

I'm the same. My family may be sad, yeah, but they'll learn to heal. I'm in so much pain that I just can't bear it anymore, ctbing is just something that I need to do. I've been living for others for long enough, it's time I start thinking about myself

 

[DeathOfKane]

I don't care either. At the end of the day me not ctbing doesn't mean I won't die. Why let myself suffer until something else takes me, just for the same inevitable to happen. Life will literally go on. Anybody can die and the world will still go around, people still have work, they still have the rest their lives and time won't pause just because I died. We've had deaths in the family before, everybody moves on. I won't be trapped here trying to please people.

 

[judal97]

I dont really care much, i mean if you end up doing it its not like you are going to know whats happening to them,you will be dead

 

[fleetingnight]

Well, you have a really good reason not to care. You shouldn't worry about the feelings of people who treat you so badly, and I'm glad you don't.

 

[iLikeFrogs]

I feel like you just described my mother. You have valid reasons to not care and you shouldn't feel bad abt it. I just don't care too, I just don't want to leave them in hard situation because they already have to take care of my grandpa and I don't want him to suffer because of my suicide and them being traumatized or grieving,

 

[restingplace]

I see so many folks discussing this and I honestly personally, live with a toxic family that I still love for some reason, don't get me wrong, as fucked as that may be.
But I don't think someone who didn't stop me from dying, when most of it started with their narcissist behavior and toxicity and self serving behavior? Would truly give a fuck if I died.
She knows I'm suicidal and yet continued to do the most toxic things.
So say I do somehow make her miss me when I'm gone I still don't give a shit about leaving her traumatized or something. I'm sure she and the rest of my family will get over it plenty fast.
So yes, I think even when I was in a relationship it was the same even when I was deluded about so much, it was the same.
What do you guys think?

I used to care a lot but I think I've reached a point of where I'm so desperate to go I don't even want to leave them a final goodbye. The people that know me well will know why I did it and it'll hurt but I'm confident they'll stay after I go because they have better people than me around them.

 

[Aloneandinpain]

I do care, so it's all about whether my pain exceeds the extent to which I care.

 

[2806]

I don't care because my family is responsible for my mental illness and trauma. If I had normal family I would have never have been suicidal. I would not have so many mental issues. I tried so hard for them be nice to me or basically not be shit to me but they were too insensitive towards me. They morally ruined me. So I don't care about them at all tbh.

 

[LifeIsBS]

same, but if i did have someone who genuinely cared then they would know why i am going for ctb so i'd atleast say goodbye to them. others can cry if they want, they'll eventually get over it, like my family do cares about me but it's more because i am member of family rather than "me".

 

[Whiston72]

I work out in The Gulf within education. In February a wonderful man with two kids and a wife back in England took his life. I would say for about 24 hrs there were some tears from the staff and then nothing. His name is rarely mentioned now. Most people just don't care.