dump224477
a mess
- Mar 18, 2023
- 71
thank you everyone who replies to my post called ruining my relationship with my jealously ^^
i feel like a lot of people are blaming my boyfriend and saying he is immature, i understand since the way i typed the situation made me sound like a victim, maybe i was, i dunno.
my boyfriend is truly the sweetest person i've ever met, im the corrupted one, we've been dating for a long time and over the time we've been dating he's done a lot for me, he's put up with a lot of my emotions that are completely unnecessary
i'm a very clingy person and feel the need to be around him all the time, he says this is unhealthy and i agree, i don't want to be so dependent on him the way i am.
i think the source of my insecurity's is around the fact that i hate myself so much, my body is hideous and i have an ugly face and features. when we met, he accepted me and everything about me, i just can't believe it because i don't believe it myself, my boyfriend is too good to be true. my boyfriend can't express things to me because in my head i always turn it negative
example: he could tell me he's watching a show with his friends, in my head what's going on is.. " oh he's gonna be starring at the girls and call them hot and find me more ugly than i am" idk lol something like that.
after he would tell me what he's doing or something j would usually act differently and he would notice and ask and i said i felt insecure or something. then an argument would happen. blah blah whatever
my problem is is that i fucking hate the way my brain works, do i even want to be happy? god i'm a big fucking burden that needs to die already. how do i not think like this??
i don't deserve him, he gives me the world and i make it miserable. i can't express how much i hate myself
i feel like a lot of people are blaming my boyfriend and saying he is immature, i understand since the way i typed the situation made me sound like a victim, maybe i was, i dunno.
my boyfriend is truly the sweetest person i've ever met, im the corrupted one, we've been dating for a long time and over the time we've been dating he's done a lot for me, he's put up with a lot of my emotions that are completely unnecessary
i'm a very clingy person and feel the need to be around him all the time, he says this is unhealthy and i agree, i don't want to be so dependent on him the way i am.
i think the source of my insecurity's is around the fact that i hate myself so much, my body is hideous and i have an ugly face and features. when we met, he accepted me and everything about me, i just can't believe it because i don't believe it myself, my boyfriend is too good to be true. my boyfriend can't express things to me because in my head i always turn it negative
example: he could tell me he's watching a show with his friends, in my head what's going on is.. " oh he's gonna be starring at the girls and call them hot and find me more ugly than i am" idk lol something like that.
after he would tell me what he's doing or something j would usually act differently and he would notice and ask and i said i felt insecure or something. then an argument would happen. blah blah whatever
my problem is is that i fucking hate the way my brain works, do i even want to be happy? god i'm a big fucking burden that needs to die already. how do i not think like this??
i don't deserve him, he gives me the world and i make it miserable. i can't express how much i hate myself